The Verdict Is In: Kolby Listenbee Is Officially Made of Glass

The Verdict Is In: Kolby Listenbee Is Officially Made of Glass

Events

The Verdict Is In: Kolby Listenbee Is Officially Made of Glass

It’s official as The Beer Bottle QBs predicted Kolby Listenbee is made of glass! In a statement that is totally not made up and is completely factual, Colts Owner Jim Ersay announced “It is simply just too dangerous to have player made entirely of glass on our football team, and for that reason we are officially releasing Kolby Listenbee. We are simply worried he would shatter like a vase hitting the kitchen floor when stepping onto the football field”.

I’m going to be honest this was a great call by us, maybe we can testify in the lawsuit against TCU? I think legally you can’t sue your university and coaches for injury if you are made of glass, right?? Ya sounds right to us. I guess we can add Law Expert alongside Medical Expert to our resume. Don’t ever say The Beer Bottle QBs are one trick ponies! Let’s hope the dismissal by Texas’s honorable justice department is swift so that it doesn’t affect football season.

Now let’s check in and see how Kolby is handling it:

Ooooooooo deep man, deep. Do you think he’s referring to the myths he created so he can sue TCU?

Woah man, no need to lash out at this children’s show. It never did anything to you bro. Also this could be considered slander, and I hear you can sue anybody for anything these day’s. Just trying to give you a heads up bud.

Yes that would be quite arrogant to think the Devil has time to single you out to ruin your life.

This is a throwback but Yikesssssssssss. He’s certainly not number one in any TCU fan’s hearts. This is a great lesson for the kids out there, that it is very important to have self awareness to avoid public faux pas in the age of social media.

WOAH, is Kolby an anti feminist? This is very problematic for your brand. I highly recommend ceasing from these verbal assaults on the poor Instagram models. They have feelings bro, and as I mentioned earlier, you can get sued for just about anything these days.

Do you think he actually has his name Trademarked? If not, should The Beer Bottle QBs scoop it up? Man would that be hilarious if we owned the trademark to his name LOL. We will certainly be looking into it. Also I think there may be a typo in the bio line……. Ex NFL WR seems more appropriate.

Also our Big Bad Ass Lawyers advised us to provide the following:

Legal Counsel Disclaimer: This Blog is a Parody of recent events in the public domain that is covered under the First Amendment of the United States Constitution.

So don’t try and sue us Kolby.

-The Beer Bottle QBs

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